Why penises make the best Christmas gifts

If you're looking for a Christmas gift for someone special this year but just can't seem to find the right thing, consider giving a penis. There are many reasons why penises make ideal gifts, not just at Christmas but at any time of the year. Here are just a few:

1. They never wear out despite being used over and over again.

2. They give tremendous pleasure both to the giver and to the receiver.

3. In the case of intact ones, they already come pre-wrapped.

4. They're better than the gift that keeps on giving; they're the gift that keeps on cumming.

5. They're unique; you'll never find another one that's exactly like the one you give.

6. They're fun to play with.

7. Forget about a box of chocolates. Penises are the best kind of cream-filled candy: You can suck on them indefinitely, and they will never diminish in size; moreover, they will always provide you with a unending supply of fresh, sweet cream.

8. They're pretty to look at, even if you're not doing anything else with them.

9. They're ageless. A penis on a young man will look and function basically the same when that man is older, regardless of how his body changes.

But the best part about why penises make the best Christmas gifts is:

10. They always come with a man attached to them. ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥